What does being in "right relationship" mean? Have you ever heard this talked about before? I, personally, hadn't, until I started my spiritual journey. It's all about relationship, isn't it? Yep, you got it. It's about the relationship we have with ourselves, with our bodies, with all parts of us (even those parts we shun). It's also about the relationship we have with everyone around us and with the world we live in.
But it's not just "any" relationship, it's "right" relationship. Perhaps I can explain more about this. When we are in "right" relationship, right action becomes possible. It's the right action we take that allows us to sink deeper and deeper into right relationship with ourselves.
The Influence of Tomas
I was first introduced to the concept of "living in right relationship" more than 30 years ago by Dr. Tom "Tomas" Pinkson, who became a dear teacher and friend.
As his homepage reads, "You are here for a reason, called in your own unique way to help shape-shift humanity's evolution toward a path of Balance, Health, and Sacred Reciprocity, recognizing your interconnection with all that has been, all that is, and all that will be." -Dr Tom “Tomas” Pinkson
This reminds me that each and every one of us has a very good reason for being here. We've got our own unique way of making a difference in this crazy world by finding that sweet spot of balance, health, and sacred reciprocity. And I believe it's all about recognizing how we're connected to everything that has been, everything that is, and everything that's yet to come.
Ayni: Sacred Reciprocity in Action
"Being in right relationship" was once again brought into my field of awareness in Peru, where I often visited to study ethnobotanicals and entheogens of the rainforest. There it was presented to me as Ayni, which I was told translates into "sacred reciprocity" and represents a fundamental principle of interconnectedness and balance in all relationships.
Nurturing Balance and Reciprocity
Ayni is a beautiful concept rooted in the wisdom of Andean indigenous cultures, particularly the Quechua people. It's all about reciprocity and the interconnectedness of life. Imagine a world where we treat each other with fairness and balance, where we give and receive in equal measure. That's AYNI. It's like a dance of mutual exchange, where we share our resources and energy in a way that benefits everyone. It's about going beyond transactions and embracing a deeper understanding of how our actions impact others and the world around us.
I was taught that when we practice Ayni, we create a harmonious flow of goodness, kind of like throwing a pebble into a calm pond and watching the ripples spread. AYNI encourages me (and us) to be generous and grateful and to recognize our interconnectedness with nature and each other. It reminds me that I have a responsibility to contribute positively and create a better world. It's like a guiding light, reminding me to live in balance and harmony and to treat others with respect and kindness. (Claudia Cuentas speaks beautifully about this in her interview with Laura Dawn on Laura's The Psychedelic Leadership Podcast, episode 60
Cultivating Harmonious Connections
For me, the concept of right relationship is rooted in the soil of integrity, which is about being honest and true to ourselves and others. It emphasizes the importance of developing and maintaining healthy relationships with ourselves, others, and our environment.
In the context of our personal growth and development, being in right relationship means cultivating a harmonious relationship with all parts of ourselves, including our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. This involves accepting and honoring our strengths and weaknesses, as well as acknowledging and working through our flaws and limitations.
The Eternal Rapport with Ourselves
Let's look at it this way: In 10,000 years, everything will change and disappear, except for one thing—our rapport with ourselves. If we can strive for an impeccable rapport with ourselves by being in right relationship with ourselves, that's what we get to take with us on our soul's journey beyond this life.
In our relationships with others, being in right relationship means treating them with respect, compassion, and empathy. It involves valuing and honoring their uniqueness and recognizing their inherent dignity and worth as human beings. This, in turn, requires active listening, open communication, and a willingness to seek understanding and resolution in conflicts.
The Power of Virtues
Living in right relationship for me also involves practicing virtues such as honesty, generosity, gratitude, forgiveness, and humility—those things we were hopefully taught as kids to honor. These virtues enable us to be more self-aware, compassionate, and responsible individuals, allowing us to create more meaningful and fulfilling relationships with others.
Living in right relationship is deeply supported by the practice of conscious language and how we talk to ourselves. I'll explain more about that in another post.
Striving for Integrity and Reciprocity
Simply put, being in right relationship is about striving for the highest form of integrity with ourselves and others. So, let's all embrace the spirit of Ayni and create a world where reciprocity and love are the foundation of our relationships and interactions. Embrace the journey, my friends, and let the dance of right relationship unfold in your lives.
"You are a sacred, worthy, luminous being. You are love and your love is for giving and receiving."
– Dr. Tom Pinkson
Written by Sergio Nikita Lialin
Sergio is a psychedelic preparation, guidance and integration coach with over 30 years of experience. His highly-unique approach combines the ancient wisdom of indigenous cultures of Latin America, where he studied extensively, with his Western training in integrative medicine and psychology. Sergio seamlessly bridges traditional guidance with his knowledge of human behavior and neuro-linguistic programming, resulting in a proprietary and transformative guiding style. As a lifelong healer, artist and spiritual counselor, he has compassionately guided individuals and couples towards healing and a more fulfilling existence, drawing inspiration from his mentorships in Mexico, Peru, Brazil, and Colombia. He is currently mentoring mental health professionals in their continued education of psychedelic-assisted therapy.
He can be reached at PsychedelicTherapyMentor@Proton.me